


You Are More

by the_secret_wordsmith



Series: Wolfstar Comfort Mini-Fest September 2020 [8]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Baby Harry Potter, Child Harry Potter, Cute Harry Potter, Depression, Drabble, Established Sirius Black/Remus Lupin, Hurt/Comfort, Jily lives, M/M, Not Canon Compliant, POV Remus Lupin, Present Tense, wolfstar
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-26
Updated: 2020-09-26
Packaged: 2021-03-07 17:47:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 934
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26661685
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_secret_wordsmith/pseuds/the_secret_wordsmith
Summary: “Were you alright?”“Not really, no,” Remus says softly. He never lies to Sirius. Never. Not since back when the dark moods started and Sirius got angry with him, grey eyes burning, angry and passionate and so full of love.Remus never lies to him.[For day eight of @swottypotter 's Wolfstar Comfort Mini-Fest]
Relationships: Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Series: Wolfstar Comfort Mini-Fest September 2020 [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1931587
Comments: 1
Kudos: 113





	You Are More

**Author's Note:**

> For Day Eight of swottypotter's Wolfstar Comfort Mini-Fest. The theme was "solitude".
> 
> CW: depression and mild alcohol abuse

Remus is alone now. He sits by the fire with raindrops trickling down the window behind him. In his hand is a glass of whiskey and he sips it, eyes dark as he stares into the flames.

Remus is alone now.

There is value in solitude: value in being alone with yourself, learning to love yourself, to _be_ yourself.

But Remus has gone past that point. He's known himself since he was a child, bitten by a werewolf and grown old on the inside before his time. He learnt to love himself when three other boys took him under their wing and loved him when he couldn't do it himself.

He has always been himself too, but right now, too long alone as he is, he is starting to not _be_ himself anymore.

Being alone is a gift right up until the moment it isn't.

The full moon is soon. The wolf will come for him, as it has since he was a young child, and Remus is weary of it all: of the rhythm of the month that drives his emotions. He is tired then he is free, then he is anxious as the moon waxes, and then comes the pain as the wolf takes him.

Remus is alone now. Another sip of whiskey. Flames crackle and outside the rain gets heavier.

CRASH.

Remus gets quickly to his feet at the sound of the front door slamming open.

“UNCLE MOONY!”

Little Harry body slams into him and Remus steps back, the energy and love and excitement of the black-haired boy entirely overwhelming. He bends down and scoops him up, looking over messy hair to see his husband grinning at him from the hall.

He's wearing a thick anorak that is dripping from the downpour.

“You drinking without me?” He demands and Remus smirks.

“Wouldn't do that, Pads.”

“He is he is he is!” Harry yells, pointing to the open bottle on the table, “Mama says that's naughty!”

“Does she?” Remus asks, eyebrows raised and Harry nods back at him wisely.

“Says it makes you dance bad.”

Sirius laughs at this, throwing back his head and dripping water all over the carpet as he strides over to Remus and Harry.

“Your mum is a very wise lady, Harry,” he says and grins, smiles, leans in to kiss Remus's cheek. “Though actually she can't be that wise seeing as she married your dad.”

That makes Remus laugh, actually laugh, and he carefully plops Harry back down on the floor.

“So did you see any fish then, Harry?” He asks, voice gentle. Harry sighs.

“We didn't get to the pond cos the rain,” he says, “And Pads was being all worried about thunder.”

“Was he now?” Remus asks and looks up at his husband.

Sirius shrugs, blushing slightly. “I was more scared of what Lily would say if I brought Harry back with his hair singed off from lightning.”

“Sure,” Remus says, feeling his heart thrum at the sight of Sirius's pink cheeks and bashful gaze. He bloody loves this man.

“I'm gonna put Harry to bed,” Sirius says and Harry groans from where he's crouched on the carpet by the fire.

“No, Pads,” he says, “It's not late.”

“It's very late,” Sirius says with a huff. He glances over to Remus, “We shouldn't have gone.”

“Don't be silly,” Remus says firmly, “It was only a bit of rain.”

That's not what Sirius meant. They both know what Sirius is worried about. Sirius is worried about Remus. He is always worried about him, Remus knows, and that makes this all so much harder.

But Remus loves Sirius, and Sirius loves Remus. And everything will be alright. They are going to be alright. Don't worry, it will get better. Remus knows this, most of the time, and when he forgets, Sirius is there to remind him.

Harry is put to bed and then Sirius comes back downstairs, towel in hand to dry off his wet hair. Remus is sitting on the sofa now and his husband plonks himself down next to him.

“Were you alright?”

“Not really, no,” Remus says softly. He never lies to Sirius. Never. Not since back when the dark moods started and Sirius got angry with him, grey eyes burning, angry and passionate and so full of love.

Remus never lies to him.

Sirius puts his arms round him and pulls him close. Remus leans into him, craving the contact, the hope that Sirius gives him everyday.

“I'm here now.”

“I know.”

“This is gonna get better, Moony.”

Remus nods, burrowing his head into the soft jumper Sirius has put on, “I know.”

Sirius strokes his hair and plants kisses everywhere his hand touches. Remus breathes in his smell, still slightly wet from outside, the towel lying forgotten on the back of the sofa. He tilts his head up to press a small kiss on Sirius's chin.

“I love you.”

Sirius inhales sharply and pulls Remus in tighter, placing kisses all over his face, and stroking his cheeks gently.

“You are more precious than the sun in the morning, or the stars at night. You are more loved than the most beautiful flower. You are more important than any dream or idea. You mean more than any story or line of poetry.” Sirius kisses him softly on the lips, “You are my heart, and with you I touch infinity.”

Remus looks into grey earnest eyes. He feels his lip quirk, his heart speed up, his soul ignite for a brief beautiful moment of splendour.

And he knows that Sirius is telling the Truth.


End file.
